6:41 PM
Learning Domestic Discipline
There's a new blog and new writer for you all to read if you'd like to do so - my amazing wife and her new blog! She was recently inspired to start her own blog about Domestic Discipline and all it has done for our marriage. Click on the link below to check it out!
I think it will give you all a different perspective on us, and help you all to see that we're genuine people just like you. We just happen to practice Domestic Discipline. That's all. Read it, bookmark it, and help me welcome my wife to the blogging world by leaving her some welcoming comments!
Posted in: Knowing Your Roles
23 comments:
Hi Chelsea! It's so nice to put a name to a face! Nice to "meet" you both! I really enjoy this blog... and look forward to hearing "the other side"! :o)
@Mikki - I know your comment was more for my wife, but I just wanted to say thank you and I really appreciate your support of the blog (and my wife's blog!). Thank you so much for reading!
All the best to you, Mikki.
-- Clint
Clint
I've soooo been waiting for Chelsea to start a blog :)
My husband really likes to hear the ladies thoughts, and so many of the blogs just seem more erotic in nature. It often makes for great reading and I can almost always "relate", but I'm looking more for feelings, emotions, and explinations. I can't wait to send him the link.
I'm sure Chelseas blog will reflect yours and she will not be giving blow by blow (pun intended lol) discriptions of punsihments.and will address the much more important issues of the how and why DD works.
Is that REALLY you guys in the picture??
newbie
@Newbie - I'm glad you're excited about my wife's blog! We are too, and although I don't know everything she has in mind as far as the content she plans to put on her blog, I'm certain it will include the things you mentioned without the detailed "play by play" of how we punish. She's a great writer, so I'm looking forward to it as well.
Yes, that's really us in the picture. Is that so hard to believe? :)
-- Clint
You guys are sooooo freaking cute =)
Chelsea is truly beautiful.
Actually yes Clint, I couldn't believe it. I just seen the the caption under the pictures that it IS you guys. I truly admire you and Chelsea for taking that kind of a leap.
The lifestyle is so misunderstood in the world and to put your image out there takes an amazing amout of courage, and CONVICTION on your parts. You and your wife are such strong advocates for DD and I am looking forward to learning more from both of you.
I'll be introducing my self to Chelsea soon =) (might want to warn her I get long winded lol)
newbie
So excited to read your blog Chelsea!
I love Chelsea's blog too! :-)
great to meet you two - you look so cute together - cant wait to read more from chelsea
love and hugs kiwi x
Thanks this is all very helpful. New to DD, and still feeling ambivalent about my fiance's need for LDD.
Generally confused as to why my fiance needs DD in the first place and why she can't just curb her own ways, especially when they trespass on myself who generally does his very best to take care of her and loves her.
That said this blog has been very helpful. But my logic circuits need more personal accounts especially from women as to why they need DD so much and what they get out of it.
I.E. why does a perfectly grown adult women, with a professional career, helps with the mortgage, finished undergrad with a 3.9 GPA, has an MBA would need to be punished like a little girl so that she can be emotionally at peace and calm in her existence.
Last, we got in a fight last night about all this and how I blew my top at her. She encouraged me to post more and ask more questions so that we can help our relationship which on the whole is generally fantastic. So here I am, posting.
Since I've given you feedback on other pictures you've added, I couldn't let this one go without saying something as well .
Very COOL picture! I also like how we (the viewer) can see the reflection of you both taking the picture in the cool shades!
Its one thing to put a picture of yourselves on the network, where the membership is smaller, but it takes a lot of courage to put it on a website that can be viewed by anyone. It's not something I could do, and have yet to do, so I congratulate you both!
Thanks for the compliments everyone! Ya'll are so sweet. :)
-Chelsea
@Newbie - Thank you so much for the kind words. We debated about whether or not to put our picture up, but we decided - you know what? This is us and this is how we live, and we know this lifestyle isn't for everyone. But we're not hiding from it since we feel DD has made our marriage so much stronger and we know it would make any marriage stronger if folks just give it a try. Thank you again for all your support. It means a lot to us.
@Lara - She's a great writer. I'm sure you'll enjoy her blog. :)
@Ash - I'm glad you enjoy it!
@kiwigirliegirl - Thank you so much. I think you'll really enjoy my wife's blog.
@Anonymous - DD is so much more than just correcting mistakes. It brings a couple closer together, and it strengthens the foundation of marriage. The foundation of trust, communication, support, and love. Even the smartest people in the world make mistakes, and even a strong marriage can get stronger. I think you'll find the testimonies of the female bloggers very helpful to you in understanding the feelings behind DD and why so many women want this in their marriage. Best of luck to you.
@Christina - Thank you! It wasn't easy to do at all and my wife and I discussed whether or not we should, but we finally decided that we don't want to hide from something we support so much. As always, thank you so much for your kind words. :)
@Chelsea - I love you sweetheart. You're blog is already fantastic.
-- Clint
I'm gonna throw this out to anonymous here- i think the questions you are asking and the things you are going through is completely normal. I happen to know who your fiancee is, and i think you guys are doing great. DD is hard to figure out in the beginning, but the benefits are unbelievable. I agree with Clint a little trip through blog-land might help you to understand why grown and successful women need this and what they get out of it. Reading your description of your fiancee, i would encourage you to start with the blog Finding Sara. Sara is also a very successful career woman, and has been practicing DD longer than most of the other bloggers. If you have a question about DD, you can likely find an answer on Sara's blog.
Poor Chelsea, she deserves better, but she might grow up and find out.
I don't know - having a stable life, an adorable child and a devoted husband who loves her very much, sounds like she's doing pretty well. I'm sure she'll appreciate your concern though, even posted anonymously.
@Christina - Thank you. My wife and I have never been happier. We're so blessed.
-- Clint
Our marriage has become so much better since DD. I rarely get spanked. But - when I do it hurts - i know that it is for my own good - and I feel so much less stressed afterwards.
To the husband w/ the wife that has the MBA
I have a Master's in Accounting and a JD. I work almost full-time - same situation. Spanking just works for us when I do soemthing wrong (ie, spend too much). I have PLENTY of control at work. I want my husband to be the head of the household.
@Anne - Wonderful! I'm so happy to hear that DD is beneficial to your marriage. That's what it's all about. That was a very nice comment and I appreciate you taking the time to share it.
All the best to you, Anne.
-- Clint
We are just beginning and I find myself negotiating when my HoH sets forth a punishment. Punishing for a new rule for example can be quite difficult for me to submit to. How can I stop arguing and accept my punishment?
@Anonymous (July 4th 11:59 PM) - Negotiating punishments is a relatively common problem. I've discussed this problem before here on Learning Domestic Discipline. You can find the post by following this link:
http://learningdd.blogspot.com/2012/03/addressing-spanking-issues-negotiating.html
It talks about how an HoH can address negotiations when the HoH goes to punish/spank.
I hope this helps you out! Best of luck to you in getting past this issue.
-- Clint
I'm not completely new to DD from previous relationships but I am just getting started with it with my husband. I brought it up to my husband and he seems to want to give it an honest try. I'm feeling insecure though and it isn't his fault. In one of my previous relationships, I had tried DD and the experience was terrible. I realized after getting out of the relationship that this was because the man I was with controlled me with emotional abuse. He called me names, he used anger as a way to get what he wanted. And he in not so many words said that it was stupid that I would want DD and that I was weak because of it. After I got out of that relationship, I worked really hard on building my self esteem and thought that I was over the hurt. Ironically though, I'm finding those old insecurities creeping back up as I'm starting into DD with my husband. Will this get any easier. Thoughts? Suggestions?
@Anonymous (August 10th 9:59 AM) - I'm so terribly sorry to hear about all you've been through. You're a strong woman for enduring all of that, and an even stronger woman for getting out of a very unhealthy relationship. I'm glad you moved on in a positive way.
Does your husband know about this past toxic relationship? Does he know these details of what you went through? If so, great. If not, I think it's important that he know about this so he can A) help you through it, and B) be sensitive to your emotions regarding certain words, phrases, etc.
There's nothing wrong with sitting down with your husband and having a true heart to heart conversation with him about what you expect in your DD lifestyle. He needs to completely understand where you're coming from and what you've gone through so he knows the best way to handle any given situation that may arise in your marriage. He can shape and mold how DD is done in your marriage that is sensitive to your past, and in a way that works best for you both.
No man should belittle, humiliate, embarrass, etc. his wife as it is, but it's magnified even moreso in your specific situation given your past. He must understand this, respect this, and adjust things accordingly. I'm not saying your husband would ever do such a thing, I just felt compelled to include this in my response to you.
I do think this will get easier for you, but it may take a little longer than most couples, and that's absolutely okay. There's no rush with any of this. Once you have everything on the table (what happened in the past, what you expect from your husband in regards to DD, etc.), I think you'll feel a lot better about things and the trust between you and your husband will grow every single day until you don't even think about these sensitive things from your past anymore.
I wish you nothing but the best of luck in moving forward in a healthy, safe, and constructive manner.
-- Clint
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