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A topic that has come up a lot in the comments and on the social network recently is the idea of maintenance spankings. With all the recent discussion about them, I figured now was the right time to discuss maintenance spankings. Maintenance spankings provide a way for the husband to keep the wife on the right track, as well as provide a means for the wife to get an emotional release. I'll explain more in just a moment, but let's start with what exactly maintenance spankings are.
|Image courtesy of mirror.co.uk.|
Maintenance spankings are light spanking sessions conducted by the husband on his wife regularly, without infraction. They're conducted in a very similar manner to how I recommend beginner level spankings be done and warm up spankings be done. The only major differences are the implement and the reason behind it. I recommend the hairbrush or wooden paddle be used when conducting a beginner level spanking, however with maintenance spankings I recommend something lighter be used, such as a spanking buddy, a wooden spoon or the hand. A hairbrush would also work, but it wouldn't be necessary to strike quite as hard as you would when conducting a beginner level spanking.
The frequency at which maintenance spankings are done is at the discretion of the husband (or head of the household). It's recommended maintenance spankings be done about a week apart, but not on the same day every week. For instance, if maintenance spankings are done every Sunday, they'll lose effectiveness since the wife knows they're coming. Anywhere from one week to two weeks apart is ideal, give or take. As always, the husband must be fair with this. If the wife is having a good week, the husband should wait a little longer to do maintenance. If she's having a rough week, do maintenance a little sooner than normal.
All the same methods recommended in the beginner level spanking post still apply when conducting a maintenance spanking. Alternating cheeks when striking, the wife is in the leaning over the bed position, approximately 15-20 strikes, etc. It's also very important that the husband comforts his wife afterward, just as he would after a traditional spanking session.
Why would a couple conduct maintenance spankings?
There are two reasons.
1) - To keep the wife on the right track, and to remind her she needs to follow the rules set forth by the husband (or head of the household) at all times. Maintenance spankings are effective in helping the wife remember to continue following the rules and to continue doing the right things so she does not break the rules during the week. Maintenance spankings essentially protect the wife from herself during the week. By the husband reminding her this way, it in turn makes it less likely a major infraction by the wife will occur during the week.
2) - To give the wife an emotional release. Some women (not ALL women) get rather emotional at times. Maintenance spankings offer a means to release those emotions so the wife feels much better afterward. This goes back to why it's so important that the wife cry after a spanking - it releases the emotions of guilt, disappointment, sorrow, etc. Sometimes just "crying it out" will help a wife feel better about whatever she is/was upset about, and maintenance spankings provide that avenue in which to give that emotional release.
There may not be an aspect of Domestic Discipline I'm more on the fence about than maintenance spankings. I'm split 50/50 as being for or against them. I'm comfortable enough with them to include them on the blog, but they aren't something I outwardly recommend couples do.
I've always felt a spanking is a punishment tool intended to correct an unwanted, dangerous or detrimental behavior, and I don't like the idea of spanking the wife when she didn't do anything wrong. I also don't like the idea of spanking when the wife is upset/crying to get her emotions out, since I feel the wife should never have to worry about showing emotion in front of her husband. HOWEVER, with that said, I understand the benefits of maintenance spankings and a lot of couples prefer them. Don't let my personal feelings discourage you from trying them if you feel they would be beneficial to your marriage. Like I said, I really am 50/50 on maintenance spankings.
Just as with all the recommendations on Learning Domestic Discipline, this is something you and your spouse need to discuss together to determine if it's something you'd like to include in your Domestic Discipline marriage. Now that you're familiar with what exactly maintenance spankings are, how they're done, and why they're done, you should talk about it with your spouse and decide if it is or is not something you want to do.
I encourage you to leave your thoughts, questions, or concerns in the comments. This entry is probably one where new DD couples would like to hear some testimonies of others who use maintenance spankings in their marriages and whether or not those couples find them helpful/useful.