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Monday, January 16, 2012

Domestic Discipline Challenges - Travel

Image courtesy of kathika.com.
  We discuss living the domestic discipline lifestyle when traveling and overcoming the challenges that come with it.  You can read this article on our new website by clicking here.

24 comments:

saffy said...

ummm ... W/we found wire coat hangers really useful for quietness apart from the ouch factor.........

Anonymous said...

I can commiserate with the in-law situation. Unintentionally exposing my in-laws to our DD would be disastrous, and I will not chance giving a spanking there. As a result my spouse acts up when we visit them. I have tried bedroom time, and the writing of the multiplication tables (unlike sentences, they are not incriminating if found), but the in laws are noisy, set in their ways and any prolonged absence provokes questions. You can't even read a book in the bathroom without questions being asked. I have given a delayed spanking when we have gotten home, but still had problems with the acting up on our next trip. I do not usually use a switch since my partner particularly fears them. However, my in-laws have a willow tree in their yard, I am thinking that the next time there is acting up, I will use any brief time that presents itself to have her cut and peal a switch with the promise that if behaviour does not improve she will be cutting, pealing and receiving a switch when we get home. The nice part about switches is that they can be made to go pick and prepare them, and the anticipation can always be extended and increased by rejecting what they bring back and sending them back for bigger ones ;)

Learning Domestic Discipline said...

@saffy - Wire coat hangers are a quiet implement no doubt, however they are a risky implement to use. The small surface area of them presents a higher risk of lacerations, welts, and/or bruising if used excessively. If you and your partner agree to the use of a coat hanger then that's obviously your choice - just please be careful with it if you choose to use it. Thanks for sharing your experience with the readers of the blog and good luck to you.

@Anonymous (January 18th 8:16 PM) - I understand your logic and it does make sense, but I am a bit concerned about potentially using an implement that she clearly fears. Her fear could be for any number of reasons, but I caution you when considering using a switch given her fear of them. It could backfire. She could resent you for it, accuse you of not caring/listening, and it could cause more problems than it helps. What you do is your choice of course - I'd just be careful with that aspect of things. Thank you for taking the time to comment and sharing your thoughts.

I wish you both the very best.

-- Clint

Anonymous said...

Clint,

We are going to Vegas next week. I have a few concerns. First, I gave her some punishments this weekend and she is more that a bit red. I want her to be looking sexy in Vegas wearing dresses and showing some skin. She knows this as well and I have a fear that she is going to act up this week, believing that I would not punish her because I don't want to have her bruised for our trip. She is already making comments to the effect that she is free of punishments this week. Secondly, I want to have fun on our trip, and I really don't want to spend time punishing her. Again, she knows this and I fear that her behavior will be poor because she feels that I certainly would not punish her while on vacation. I have told her that this is not the case and I will punish her if needed. However, I don't think that she believes this to be the case. Can you offer suggestions? Thanks

Anonymous said...

I think another silent punishment is given the wife a butt plug and corner time . very effective and hurts so much . also ginger is effective and a silent method of punishment

SmS Photography said...

^^^ A "butt plug" seriously? This is not a humiliation page. This is the practice of The man being HOH the woman following her husbands lead in a respectful manner. I usually do not judge, but that is really mean!

Anonymous said...

A butt plug ...... I don't even know what this is. My guess is I don't want to know.

SmS Photography said...

A butt plug is triangle shaped round tool that is used in a sexual way to "open" the anus. It is not only disgusting but also used in pornography.

Trust said...

You could say the same about DD.

Learning Domestic Discipline said...

@Anonymous (January 29th 10:13 PM) - I apologize for the late response to you. I'm sure I'm late now, but I'll give you my two cents anyway.

I have a couple of concerns of my own with your comment. I can't say I know exactly what you mean when you say your wife is "more than a bit red", but that doesn't sound good. You also reference bruising in a casual way, as if it's something that isn't out of the ordinary with your punishments. There shouldn't be any bruising. If there is, I would ensure you're conducting a warm up spanking each time you spank. If that doesn't help, then you need to reduce the strength in which you strike. Something is going wrong in the spanking process if she is bruising, and your number one concern should be correcting that.

Having said that, it's common for wives to feel as though they're in the clear from punishments when on vacation. You commented on the Travel Obstacle blog entry here, so I assume you read it. My recommendations are within it, but I'll go over them again. I'd recommend sitting down with her the day before you go and make your expectations clear in a calm, reasonable and rational way. Punishments such as corner time, writing lines, writing apology letters, and writing reports on scriptures (if you're a religious couple) are all feasible options while on vacation, as are silent spankings. There are a few options for you, but it's important that your wife understand that DD doesn't stop simply because you're out of town, and that understanding comes from a discussion about it with her.

Good luck to you, and enjoy your trip!

@Anonymous (January 30th 6:15 PM) - The use of a butt plug is not something I recommend, support or condone for punishment. Rarely do women consent to this, and even so, it's not something that is consistent with a Domestic Discipline marriage. While this may be effective for you and your spouse, it's not something I recommend DD couples do. Many women find this humiliating and/or degrading. If you and your partner have consented to this then that's your choice, but butt plugs should not be a part of a DD relationship. I don't see the "love" in the use of one. This, of course, is just my opinion.

Whatever you and your spouse choose to incorporate into your marriage, I wish you nothing but happiness. All the best to you.

@SmS Photography - You're right - this is not a humiliation page and I agree with you that the use of a butt plug is "mean." It's simply not necessary. Thank you for your thoughts on the matter, and for explaining to us all what a butt plug is.

@Anonymous (February 2nd 5:01 PM) - You know what it is now! I knew I started this blog for a reason. :)

@Learning to Iron - You could. There are always people out there who will exploit something in an inappropriate way. It's a shame, but it's an unfortunate reality.

All the best to you all.

Anonymous said...

My HOH and I first learned about silent spankings from your site in December and he has told to me to write and let you know how beneficial they have been and how they have totally changed my behavior and demeanor. We travel a lot and I would always use it as an excuse to "act out" I knew there would be consequences but not until later. Now I am required to carry the ointment in my purse and punishments occur on the spot. Just this week we were in a crowded airport and I was rude to him and the gate agents. He immediately took me into the family bathroom, had me bare my bottom and liberally applied the ointment. The burning and stinging lasted the entire flight and sitting in my seat with "seat belt securely fastened" was most uncomfortable. The worst part was having to apologize to the gate agent, but it was that or another silent spanking before take off.

Anonymous said...

My husband gives maintence spankings before we go on trips. The last time before we got on the plane of my in laws (maybe because I've acted out before!) he soundly spanked me with his belt 8 times before we left the house telling me no bad behavior would be tolerated. We do not normally practice maintenance spankings but in this place it is acceptable for us!

Learning Domestic Discipline said...

@Anonymous (February 16th 6:57 PM) - I apologize for the late response to your comment. Sometimes they get lost in the shuffle. My late response was completely unintentional.

I'm happy to hear the silent spankings are helping your marriage. Silent spankings certainly aren't pleasant, but hopefully you and your husband see the long term benefits in incorporating them into your DD practices.

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. All the best to you.

@Anonymous (April 2nd 11:10 PM) - I appreciate your comment very much! Thank you for sharing your idea with the readers. I think it's a solid option for those who need help in a similar situation.

All the best to you both.

-- Clint

Anonymous said...

My wife and I live in a small apartment building and are new to DD. She is concerned about our neighbors hearing spanking sounds and suggested we use a loopy johnny saying that if she needed a spanking, she would prefer a more quiet rather than a less painful method.
My wife is not accustomed to being spanked, however, and while she asked for this dynamic I highly doubt she realizes just how painful a spanking can be. Is this loopy johnny a bad idea? Is this too harsh and if so do you have any suggestions? The cream may work in a pinch, but as you say, it's not ideal for a primary method.

Learning Domestic Discipline said...

@Anonymous (April 22nd 9:25 PM) - If you're new to the DD lifestyle, I'd recommend staying away from the loopy johnny until you both are more comfortable with the spanking dynamic. It's an intense implement, and not one I typically recommend even for more experienced couples. But, truth be told, it IS quiet.

I'd suggest using a wooden spoon to start with. It's relatively quiet and packs a rather intense sting on the surface of the buttocks. Also, in your specific situation turning up the stereo or television set to drown out any potential spanking noise may be worth considering in an apartment as well. Even if it's just for a moment, it will help conceal the striking sounds.

Just an idea. Best of luck to you both, and welcome to the DD lifestyle! There's no doubt in my mind it will reap many wonderful benefits for you both.

All the best.

-- Clint

Anonymous said...

Would you ever recommend a "reminder" spanking before a trip? Not a harsh punishment spanking but something to help keep good behavior in mind?

Learning Domestic Discipline said...

@Anonymous (June 13th 10:47 PM) - Yes, absolutely. A reminder spanking can be a good way to help keep a wife's behavior acceptable for the duration of a trip/vacation.

I'd be prepared, however, for potential spankings during the trip in the event a spanking situation does in fact arise. I'd recommend bringing along implements or Capsaicin Cream, and make sure your wife knows that you are, just in case the need arises to use them on your trip. Hopefully that wouldn't be the case, but you'd be prepared if it is.

I hope this helps! Good luck to you and enjoy your trip!

-- Clint

Anonymous said...

We don't make alot of money and so we rent a room in a house. Whan I need to be punished the strike needs to be quiet. (I use a pillow to muffle the sounds I make)
We handle this in a few ways-
First- I recieve mantance spankings each week when the house is empty. My bottom is reddened over his knee, we discuss what I need to work on for the week, and a certain number of swats from the paddle is given to my reddened bottom for each issue I need to pay more attention to. This generally is enough to keep me in line.
Punishment- I am punished for things accordingly as well. If I slip up and get mouthy, don't keep my chores done, get an additude that won't quit, slack on studying or other minor offense I spend a while in the corner with my bottom bared, and if my behavior included my mouth I ussually have to hold a bar of soap in my mouth. Then, when my man decides he is ready to punish me I lay face down on the bed and he whips me with a plastic coat hanger. It has never cut me, but it does sting. If I feels he needs to be more severe with me, or if I ever raise my voice loud enough for anybody else in the house to hear I'm bent over the edge of our bed with a pillow under my face and arms, and my bottom up in the air, and he whips my bottom and back of my thighs with a doubled loop of electrical wire slightly thiner than my pinky and covvered with rubber. (it was originaly a plug off something that broke) He once used a piece of thick extension cord, the orange kind, but saves this only if I start really screaming at him and won't stop.
The plastic coat hanger only stings while he is spanking me with it. The loop of electic wire stings alot more, and leaves marks but has never cut me. The extension cord hurts ALOT and leaves thick welts. All the implements are silent however, and they sure are effective! Thankfully my weekly spankings ussually help me keep my tounge in check, but if they don't I know my bottom could be bared for the spanking I deserve, not matter who is around.

Learning Domestic Discipline said...

@Anonymous - The electric cord is not something I recommend couples spank with for the precise reason you stated in your comment - it easily leaves "thick welts." I hope this is an implement you have consented to using in your marriage.

Aside from that, your comment has a lot of great tips for those in a similar situation where quiet implements are necessary. I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts/experiences.

All the best to you.

-- Clint

Anonymous said...

Clint-
Thanks for the support. We tried the cord once, completely with my consent,he even made sure right before he ussed it that it was ok with me even though I had already given my consent to the idea the first time he asked me and he only struck me with it five times. It hurts alot, but the welts and bruises it leaves are even worse, we talked about it and because of that he is never going to use it again. He will punish me every day for a week, twice a day if I'm real horid, but won't try that cord again.
Thanks again
Anonymous

Learning Domestic Discipline said...

@Anonymous (August 17th 9:07 AM) - My pleasure. I'm glad everything worked out for the best in the end.

Best of luck to you going forward.

-- Clint

Sia said...

Just offering an opposing viewpoint here on the 'no bruising' rule.

If this were my lifestyle and I was the submissive partner, it would be more-or-less an impossible rule to maintain - I can fall over and bruise myself - it's no harder than getting a graze.

What alternative rule would you suggest be followed in that situation?

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